Wednesday, August 26, 2009

This just in - Ted Kennedy still Dead

Mary Jo Kopechne could not reached for comment.

From the Onion: Kennedy Curse claims 77-year old tumor ridden binge-drinker

From Iowa Hawk: You stay here While I Swim and Get us some universal Health Care

From Andrew Breitbart: "How I calculated WHEN to attack TK: Multiplied time he spent trying to save MJKs life & to be safe multiplied it by billion. But still got 0."

From Roger Kimball The Kennedy family has issued a eulogistic statement about the death of the Senior Senator from Massachusetts. Right and proper, I suppose, but I couldn’t help recoiling from its lists: “Edward M. Kennedy — the husband, father, grandfather, brother and uncle we loved so deeply — died late Tuesday night at home in Hyannis Port.”Edward M. Kennedy,”

I heard echoing behind those words, “Liar, cheat, drunk, philanderer, and — let’s not forget — inadvertent murderer.

”The tsunami of sentimental pap about Kennedy is already churning, gushing, rushing to inundate the public with a nauseating and untruthful fairy tale about the “Lion of the Senate.” The Lyin’ in the Senate is more like it. Kennedy was 77 when he was taken off last night, Mary Jo Kopechne had just turned 29 when Kennedy’s car veered off the bridge in Chappaquiddick and he wriggled free and swam to shore, leaving the young woman trapped in the car to drown."

Others Say Goodbye to Fat Ted:

  • But who can forget the happy, dignified moments, like the halcyon days of the William Kennedy Smith rape trial? Au Bar! Classy, indeed.
  • For whom did Sen. Kennedy show compassion? Bork? Thomas? The Kopechnes? Please, this is not about politics. This is about decency.
  • So... Can I imagine life without Ted Kennedy? As a matter of fact, I can. Tonight, I will go to bed and sleep. Tomorrow, I will wake up, consume a caffeinated beverage of some sort and go to work. After work, I will go back to my house, eat dinner and go to bed. The next morning, the cycle will start again. As hard as it may seem for those at MSNBC to believe, the chances of me thinking of Ted Kennedy in that average day are roughly 0.0%.
  • Which was the great part, killing Mary Jo, abusing the waitress, supporting infanticide, or becoming a KGB operative to be a traitor to our country?
  • IF by “greatest statesman”, you mean greatest manipulator, boozer, murderer, and total a$$ who pretty much bastardized his own children(IMHO)when he had his marriage to Joan annulled, yeah, then I agree, he was one of the greatest. I think it’s gonna be really warm for Teddy from now on…R.I.H.
  • There is not one thing he proposed that deals with helping people who actually work for a living, or a business, or promoting capitalism. It is an absolute litany of destructive liberalism. He is the absolute worst.
  • ”His last words to Obama were "Just win one for the Swimmer"
  • I’m starting to think that Dean Wormer was wrong. Apparently fat, drunk, and stupid IS the way to go through life.
  • Ted Kennedy wasn’t particularly smart but he knew he could count on rubes like you keep voting for him despite all his misdeeds. Was he sticking up for you while moving his assets offshore to avoid his own tax policies? Or killing a wind-power plant that might sully the view from his mansion?

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